Hey family, we have this week’s updates ready for you, but first I’d like to talk to you about something my father told when I was around 9 years old. I remember my dad talking to me about getting into fights and how if I followed his advice I would never loose a fight.
Interestingly, even after listening to my dad’s advice I got beat up in a fight so I dismissed his sage advice. However, I am going to share that advice with you and share what I learned and how 30 years later the advice my father gave me ended up being right after all!
Boy, if you are in the right, you will never loose a fight!
My father wasn’t a man of many words, he is a retired vet who fought in Vietnam as well as life long martial artist in his own right.
What I discovered through my own practice of Wing Chun and Tai Chi, to get the internal side of those martial arts to work for you, you have to be blameless. In other words, you can’t be the person instigating the fight. Part of this is so you never reveal your intentions to your opponent.
The fascinating thing about human beings is our body language reveals a lot about us. What this means is if you are harboring anger, vengeance, hostility, etc,, then you are internally manifesting thoughts & feeling via your body language.
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One of the things you learn through internal martial arts training is how to control your emotions. Once you have your own emotions in check, you can then read your opponents intentions and they won’t be able to read yours.
It will help you to be able to read people in general better, when you don’t allow your emotions to rule you. For this aspect of training to work for you, you really must have a peaceful heart that isn’t seeking trouble.
If you are 100% blameless that frees your mind to listen to what’s going on around you. The thing is if you are only focused on your own emotions (which is what most people do), then you cannot hear what your opponent is saying to you, because you are too busy listening to yourself.
Looking back on my father’s advice, I realize now that if someone picks a fight with me, it’s only because they started the fight. This means they are revealing themselves to me through their body language and the sound of their voice. They are so focused on themselves that they will not expect what I am going to do, because I will remain calm and listening.
It’s like having the high ground on a battlefield. The secret to using internal martial arts to your advantage is not wanting to fight in the first place.
And this works in all interactions with people, you will be surprised at what you can learn and how you can improve your life, if you leave the opinions and emotions behind and listen more.
Now back to me getting beat up even after my dad told me his advice. I didn’t start the fight, so I was in the right. However, I did want to beat him up. I was angry and tense. I was focused on feeling embarrassed in front of people. I was scared I was going to lose and be made fun of. My ego and pride was all in the wrong.
Basically I wasn’t calm in my spirit. I was trying to win. Did you know that when you are feeling energy you can feel someone trying to win? I can’t tell you how many times over the years I’ve had someone say to me, “How did you know I was going to do that?” My reply is always, “Because I can feel you wanting to do that to me.”
Bonus training exercise: Next time you are in a public place with lots of people, observe people without an opinion. Just take notice of their posture and body language, then in your mind label people as a friendly or a threat. Also, when you are talking to strangers take note in your mind how that person’s energy makes you feel.
Energy speaks to us, if we would just listen.
In this way you will start building your internal listening skill set which will help you in Kung Fu and life.
Now on to your training…
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